Dear Conservative Party

I never thought in my wildest dreams that I would ever write a post about UK politics. But yet, here it is, in all its glory. In general I think British politics is a bit boring, to be honest - but I've been paying close attention due to the gay marriage debate ensuing lately, and something has really frustrated me.

So this is kind of an open letter, kind of a blog post, and super duper advice, to the Conservative party.

Dear Conservative party.

Pull your damn self together. You've known for a long time now that David Cameron wanted to introduce gay marriage to the UK - its not a recent surprise. So why the last minute party implosion? You're apparently worried about losing the ethnic minority vote, with their 'traditional values' - this is silly in itself, because in one breath you are criticising immigrants being in this country, but you're worried about their opinions? I'm not saying its right, just hypocritical. A good percentage of those minorities don't, or can't, even vote! So why are they more important than the quite large British gay community?

Not to mention, if you were going to lose the homophobic vote, you did it waaay back when Cameron announced he supported same-sex couples getting married. So instead of now fighting within your party, you should get behind him, and be part of bringing Britain into the future. Whether you agree with lgbt marriage or not, you must know that it will happen at some point - countries all over the world and US states are moving towards equality, so you might as well be on the right side of history

.
At the moment, you are losing everyone's vote - homophobes wouldn't vote for you because of the same-sex marriage law introduction, and, more importantly, the many, many people who would be more likely to vote for a party who support gay marriage (88% of 25-39 year olds, apparently) also wouldn't vote for you at the moment, because we couldn't trust that the whole party is on the right side!

Internal party arguing just divides your audience in half, which won't be good for any election results.

So please, get it together, get behind good ole' Davie C, and help bring the UK into the future.

Thanks.

Social Media – the new way

Recently, I have taken a step back to consider just how social media has changed my life and the scary fact is, it has had a huge impact. From the way I communicate, to what I communicate on, and to whom I communicate – everything has changed so much!

It wasn’t all that long ago that I was at university and the distance between my friends from school and I seemed huge. We grew apart and I have very few school friends left today. You could say part of that reason is because I was rubbish at staying in contact – true – but I think the distance meant we grew apart in other ways. We had less ways to stay in touch so we didn't. I made friends with people I saw regularly.

That’s not to say we lived in the dark ages, but our main way of staying in touch was email or text. Facebook was just coming into play and MSN messenger was useful – if people were online at the same time - but very few people had laptops and phones with internet access were not yet in the market.

I look at who my closest friends are now, and they are all friends I have gained as an adult. It’s true that part of that reason is because they are people I have the most in common with, but part of that comes down to social media. I am friends with people who I communicate with on common ground and do so regularly.

Even looking back at the start of Laura and my relationship – a whole 50 months a go, or just over 4 years, and things have moved quickly in that time frame. After getting together, L took off to Oz for a month, and our main form of contact was Facebook chat. We would spend hours messaging to and fro and we felt connected though she was on the other side of the world. If she emailed, it would come through to my phone so the distance seemed less.

At work we would Skype – which we once got into huge trouble for after a manager printed off an entire pack of paper worth of our conversations she had screenprinted! Seriously though, who has the time to do that!!! But it was our way of being in touch throughout the day. We now do it on our IM app (although neither of us have anywhere near as much time). Wherever we are, we’re in touch.

Then I look at Facebook – can you remember a time without Facebook, or ‘my past book’ as I sometimes think of it? It’s where all my friends from the past exist. I rarely see most of my Facebook friends, but it’s nice to see the updates and to know how people are getting on, see photos of what they look like now. It’s also my online photo album, so serves a definite purpose.

For me though, Twitter was the game changer. Laura and I share an account because individually we aren't that interesting, and realistically would not tweet much, but I love it as a form of being kept up to date. We are connected to those who we share interests with, have things in common with and who make us smile. We also get the latest news stories from around the world, and from Laura's home state. We find out about awesome London events through it, and even enforced a rule that if someone annoys/bothers us for more than 3 days, we unfollow - it’s a rule that means we enjoy it even more.

My current phone home screen
with all it's social media icons

Alongside all the other media we currently partake in, we also love Instagram – it is perfect for Laura, who has quadrupled my photo count on Facebook since meeting her! She loves photos, taking photos, preserving memories and now she can love looking at photos. Same goes for Pinterest (she her blog post for why she loves it)!

But alongside the daily social media that keeps us up to date on the important, not-so important and trivial things, we have our beloved blog. We've mentioned it a few times, but we really did start this to share what we were doing with L’s ever so far away family - but what it has become, what it has changed and what it has impacted are huge and were completely unexpected.

1) Our friends – Lauren and Sarah - best friends to be precise, have come from our blog. In the last year, most parts of our lives have become integrated. We have become each other's support systems, confidants, holiday buddies and more. We text, tweet, Facebook, email and share our plans, helping each other along the way. Without social media we would have never met!

2) Then there are our other friends – virtual and those we have met in person. We love that we have different things in common with different friends, for instance:

• Similar interest blogs - these are people similar to us, not always gay, but who we get along well with as a couple
• Travel buddies - Those who have traveled or do travel just as much, if not more, than us - swapping stories is great
• Future life friends - Couples with the marriage and the babies, who we look forward to following suit
• Wedding watchers - I have lost count of the number of wedding blogs we follow – those planning to get married, those who have just gotten married, those who advise on getting married – you get the idea!
• A different perspective - probably our broadest category, but in this are blogs we find make us smile, give us something to think about or just gives us insight into a world different than ours

3) Our social circle has widened. I never thought that we would have friends that I've never met but I do – it really is about volume of contact. I feel like the virtual element provides a starting point, and common interests, that could take months to get to in the real world. If we do end up meeting bloggers or tweeters, we usually like them as much as we do online, and there is no time wasted trying to find things to talk about. In fact we are in contact with them more than older friends.

For Laura, who doesn't have the social group here of school friends that a lot of people do, its meant a way to meet people she doesn't work with, and who have similar interests to us. It's harder than you'd think to make friends these days who you didn't go to school or work with without using the internet!

4) We've found out more about the LGBTQ community that we would have if we weren't involved in blogging. Whether it's through actively seeking information or being told about information the blog has been an access portal.

5) Then there is the less important, but very nice to have benefit. We have occasionally been asked to write for other blogs – the feeling that gives is a real sense of pride. We sharing great news, our engagement springs to mind – we were so grateful for all the well wishes. Competition wins and freebies– thanks’ Nandos, Heinz and Superbreak!

Some of the lovely comments we received on our engagement post.

That’s the biggest impact social media has had – the way we communicate with the outside world.

Can you imagine waiting to get at your home desktop computer to check your email?

Can you imagine finding out news 3 days after it’s happened?

With easier communication comes easier interaction, and it really does make the world a smaller place. Laura’s Mum can work out where we are, what we are doing and how best to get hold of us at any time of day. Fro Idaho. Crazy! Watching the final of Survivor the other day the presenter reflected ‘can you imagine watching TV and only being able to share your opinion with those sat next you instead of the entire world?!’ Well, no, Jeff Probst, we can't!

We no longer just watch, listen, text, talk or call we interact, we multitask, we share and it’s with a world far bigger than I could have ever imagined. And I love it!!!

Date Night review: The Lounge Cinema Fine Food & Film

Well Laura surpassed herself this date night!!! This planner of mine had the great idea of booking us into a showing of The Great Gatsby at The Lounge cinema in Bayswater, London.  This cinema is unlike any cinema I have ever been to - at this cinema they serve you dinner while you watch the film in the most amazingly opulent surroundings!

If you have read any of date night posts in the past you may know the idea behind the surprise date night is that one of us has to come up with a date idea and give very little idea about what is involved expect the date and what to wear! We take it in turns and this month it was over to Laura.

This night was one I had just under a weeks notice about so I tried to put it out of my mind until the day it was happening. From 3pm on-wards I was ready with questions; where was it? How long would it take to get to? Why am I dressed up? Will I have been before?

Laura gave little away!

After work we met at Hyde Park corner and got a bus together towards Bayswater. At this point Laura mentioned that we may want to get a snack as we wouldn't be eating till gone 9pm. This sent my mind into overdrive and by the end of the bus ride Laura had submitted and I had found out we were seeing The Great Gatsby and eating in the dark. Although I knew this information I was still a little confused.

As we arrived in Bayswater we entered the Whiteleys shopping centre and headed straight upstairs to the Odeon, it's here that I got my first sight of; The Lounge.

As the film didn't start till 9pm we had almost 2 hours to entertain ourselves and it just so happened that the Whiteleys centre were holding a Great Gatsby themed party downstairs and we were invited! We were given a cocktail on arrival, party food to fill us up and dancers, singers and a brilliant piano player to entertain us. We also got to dress up and get our photos taken. It was great fun!

After we had got into the 1920's spirit it was time to make our way into The Lounge. It was beautiful. The bar area is like a high scale venue, it has huge sofas and seats and waitress services. We ordered cocktails and relaxed until we were called to enter the theatre.


As we took our seats we checked out the menus, reclined our seats, raised the foot rests and enjoyed snuggling up on the Love Seats Laura had pre-booked. We were on our own little island ready to watch The Great Gatsby in 3D in with waiter/ress service. We buzzed and ordered the food just as the film started.

Wait just 1 sec.......getting this seat just right is important :)

Laura ordered steak sliders with a side of onion rings and I went for the Mexican not dog, vegetarian sausage, guacamole, grated cheese, jalapenos chilli, sweet corns, tomatillo salsa and chips! The food was DELICIOUS!!! The whole menu was designed by a professional chef and you could tell! It was not the cheapest date but it was worth it.

The film itself was perfect viewing for the surroundings. Like Moulin Rouge this film has elements of glamour, opulence and majesty that seemed all the more real in 3D. Admittedly neither of us had read the book but the film itself seemed to fly through the story line. Leonardo Di Caprio stole the show as the lead but it was the party scenes that made it worth seeing at the cinema.

The rest of the film lacked 'bite' or real impact (in my personal opinion). Narrated by Toby Maguire as Carraway he never really convinced us that he was the party boy or the innocent - he just seemed nice. The same could be said for Carey Mulligan as Daisy Buchanan - she never really convinced us she was ready to run away with Gatsby.

If anything the film was like a grown up Romeo and Juliet without such tragedy. It took us on a journey where we unsure who to support, in fact Isla Fisher as Myrtle probably made the best case as the trapped 'other woman'. I would choose this type of film over thrillers or action movies as the insight into 'how the other half lived' was probably the best part of the film for me. Who doesn't love the fantasy right?!

I can officially say I was sad when the film ended, not just how it ended, but the fact that we had to leave behind our luxury surroundings. It was the best film viewing experience I have ever had.

I am definitely grateful to my wonderful Laura for the experience! She really is the best planner!

Happiness, by Laura xx

One of our favourite bloggers, Miki from Becoming What I Always Was, did a post this week on what makes her happy, or is making her happy at the moment - we thought that is a GREAT idea! It's always good, in the busy days, weeks and months, to be able to take a moment out to remember the things that really make the world go 'round!

So I thought I'd do one, as I'm having quite a difficult week at work, and could use a reminder of how lucky I am!

1. Sarah. Of course. It makes me happy to know that I could spend (and have, in certain periods of our relationship) every moment with her, 24 hours a day, and we never get sick of each other, or run out of things to say. She's my very best friend, and the only one that can make me smile on days like today.

2. When Sarah picks me up from work. Because not only is it an amazing gesture that means I won't have to fight for a seat next to smelly elbow-y people just to sit in traffic for 45 minutes, but I get to sit in traffic in the comfortable car, and see HER 45 minutes before I would have otherwise! (Sensing a theme here?) Also, I get a funny sense of pride when I introduce S to someone from my office - I like people to see how lucky I got in scoring her!!

3. Myfitnesspal. It's been my constant companion over the last few months, and though there are days where I lose my way and eat, I don't know, a whole bar of Cadbury's chocolate in one sitting (no, not the small one-person bars...) it's always reassuring to calculate everything, to know that I'm working towards my goal. I like it even on the odd day where it has to guilt trip me for not eating enough calories.

4. Planning. Right now I'm simultaneously planning Sarah's 30th, Pride London, a trip home, Christmas (yes, already!) and our wedding - all while working and living a normal, busy life. Just because I like to always have something 'fun' to think about - it helps us be able to do great things, and helps me get through the hard weeks! Of course, I enjoy life while its happening, and aren't constantly focused on the future, but I always have an eye there. Just in case!

5. The internet. I can't tell you how much I love speaking with friends, old and new, and the major way I do that is through social media. I know every once in awhile I get really fed up of this blogging/twitter/FB/insta business, but for the most part, I love it. Even emails - I adore waking up and having an email from a good friend who is really far away!

6. My family. Speaking to my parents on Skype is always one of the very best parts of my week. I get a good hour with them each Sunday, and its probably more actual quality speaking time than we would have if I lived in Boise! I like hearing what they are up to, telling them everything that happened to me in the week, seeing Abby the dog make an appearance, and generally being reminded of how damn cool my parents are.

7. Lunch. You didn't think I'd get through this list without mentioning food, did you? Every day for lunch I have greek salad with chicken breast. It's literally just 4 ingredients - tomatoes, cucumber, feta and chicken. And together, it is absolutely magic. Probably my favourite healthy meal ever. Which is why I have it every day haha.

8. Nail polish, when I've just done it I feel so girly and happy, and like my giant hands are actually quite pretty! Unfortunately I haven't mastered the art of the long-lasting manicure yet, so I don't get this joy very often. But I have it now!! Type, pretty fingers, type!!

9. Pinterest. Yes, its kind of social media, but I don't really use it to interact with people - I just love the potential in Pinterest. I can make every bit of me better through it! I've already used it to improve my hairstyle repertoire, my fashion sense, cooking skills (recipe heaven!!), wedding, and when we have a home, you'd better believe I'll be pinning the heck out of it!

10. Ummmmmm.... OH! My strawberry plant is making me a very happy little farmer lately. When we got the pot and I put it together, and watered, and watered, and watered, and nothing happened for weeks, I was pretty sure I'd accidentally killed seeds and could never again be trusted to grow things. But then they came, one by one - I currently have 9 green spurts!!! I win at gardening!!

Phew, I actually feel a lot better - you should definitely try this!